The Beginning Of An End

Endings are things we would always dread.

Like any other story, things may eventually come to an end.

Still, we hold on to those things that prevent an ending from happening.

Give it all that you’ve got. It’s always worth the try…the risk.


The Irony

When you look back on all the good things that happened, it all the more makes you feel nostalgic. You try to feel again the feelings you felt during those moments that made you smile and all giddy.

Sometimes, instead of that, it makes you want to just cry your heart out. You feel pain in reliving great and happy feelings you once felt.

The irony of happiness and nostalgia.

The truth about melancholy.

They are real.

“Tadhana” And Then Some

I gave in to the hype of “That Thing Called Tadhana.”

Sometime in the past, the lines that were said brought back memories of the past.  #HugotPaMore as the hashtag goes.  Memories that would remain to be such.  I’ve moved on from them and I am pretty sure about that.

I know how harsh those lines could be.  The same lines I wouldn’t want to hear myself speak or be said to me by other people – ever again – hopefully – and definitely, I would not want others to experience.

Although I believe that destiny can be steered by the choices we make, there are things that happen that are beyond our control.  I know that He is the one steering the wheel when that happens.  And with that in mind, I’m hopeful that destiny or fate would side with me in the days to come.

Big Day

After enduring a 1.5-hour drive to the hospital by myself, I underwent a 2-hour physiotherapy session that has been modified to further help regain the strength of my bad knee.

After an hour of waiting for my doctor (who, by the way, looked really dashing today), I finally had my stitches taken out and further post-surgery instructions were given:

1.  Lose weight.  I need to lose 30-50 more pounds in the next 2 years to avoid a major surgery.  Now this got me cringing (the major surgery part)  but I know this can be done because I’ve already shed off the same in the past 2 years.

2.  I need to get that knee injection done by March 3rd to help in the healing process and to aid in the normal use of my bad knee.  The cost is a problem but I’ll deal with that when it’s already time.

3.  1 more week of rest, ice packs on the bad knee for pain.  No more pain killers for me.  Let the knee heal naturally.

4.  1 more month of therapy until I regain the normal strength of both my legs and knees.  Of course, further assessment would be made after that.

5.  No very strenuous activities yet for my knees.

6.  Massage the scars every so often (and for as long as I can only feel tolerable pain) so as not to have ugly bumps on my knees.

7.  Work to resume after next week.

The best part of the day came when I was officially told that I can now go back to driving.  Yipee!  At least I wouldn’t feel guilty getting behind the wheel already (which I did 2 days ago).

Endured 2 hours to get home.  But I did enjoy the drive.  It felt great!

The day ended receiving text messages from him.  We’ll see if there would be some progress on that.  No expectations though.  I’ll take each day as it comes for us.

This was indeed a big day for me and I’m grateful.

On Goals And Making Them Happen

To undergo rehab takes a lot of courage especially when you see worse cases than what you have.  It can dampen your spirits in more ways than one.  Seeing them gave me the inspiration to actually do more than what is required of me.  I pushed myself to go as far as I could (with medical advice, of course) so that I could easily regain, at the very least, the near normal use of my legs and knees since the surgery.

11 days after the surgery, it feels great when I’m now able to traverse my flight of stairs like a normal person does even though it takes some time for me to do so.  More so, when I try to get to walk around my house without the aid of a cane even for just a few minutes.  These are baby steps that are already big accomplishments in my book.

Today, I challenged myself to go back to driving (Now, this is against my doctor’s advice. Hehehe!).  It was inevitable to experience a little bit of pain.  However, in the end, my decision to go back behind the wheel has proven that anything is possible if you will it to happen.  I knew it would be different if it were an ordinary day and I will definitely be hearing from my doctor.  But I know that this is still a very good thing.

Rehab will still continue in the next 3-4 weeks.  My wounds still have to completely heal.  I’ll be getting a complete report on my progress in the next few days.  Medical clearance, hopefully, would come next.

If one is really bent on reaching a goal, no amount of pain or hardship will deter you from doing so.  Now, I am looking forward and can’t wait to go back to my so-called normal life.