Surprising Intention

I was surprised to know and hear from you directly that you had the intention of asking me to join your family reunion today – so that they could get to meet me.

Though thought bubbles about that lingered for a while and for whatever intentions you had in mind for that, it made me smile.

Thank you for that smile.

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Test of Faith and Strength

God sure has His ways of testing our faith and strength. And it comes at the most unexpected times.

It’s okay to question why things had to happen. But I know for sure that these things happen for a reason and that these trials and challenges can only make you a better person. Don’t lose hope. Keep the faith. See where He will lead you.

I pray that everything will be okay. It will be.

My Homecoming

Seeing the sun rise as the plane taxied toward the tarmac was the best feeling ever!

The past 5 weeks have been a learning journey for me. I was tested in all forms. And yeah, I survived.

And now, all I want to do is to catch up with lost time with myself, my family, and friends. I can’t wait to enjoy the life I had before I endured the 5 weeks I was away from the place I call home.

Merry Christmas!!!

Sana (I Wish)

Hindi mo alam kung gaano ko kagusto na makita ka ulit. Ang tagal na kasi kitang hindi nakita.

Marami akong nami-miss. Ilang Sabado na rin na hindi tayo nakapagkape at nakapunta sa mga madalqs na pinupuntahan natin. Yung malanghap ang malansang hangin ng Manila Bay sa gabi. Yung mga usapang inaabot ng madaling araw. Yung mga kulitan at asaran na sobrang inaabangan ko rin maganap. Kahit saglit lang. Kahit ilang oras lang.

Yun lang, hindi ko alam kung nasa iisang lugar tayo. Hanggang ngayon kasi hindi ko pa rin alam kung ano ba ‘ko sa buhay mo.

Sana pareho tayo ng naiisip.

Sana nami-miss mo rin ako.

Sana pareho tayo ng nararamdaman.

Sana lang. Sana.

Hanggang sana na lang muna ako hanggang magkaroon ako ng lakas ng loob magtanong. At sana kung dumating yun, handa na rin ako sa magiging sagot mo.

Ten Months

The past 10 months have been a whirlwind ride that I can’t seem to get enough of. This, despite the fact that it should not be the case.

Questions have been running in my mind and yet all this time, I still can’t muster the strength to ask where we are at this point.

No matter how much I tell myself that I am already prepared for all the possibilities, I am so terribly scared of these possibilities.

But if only to get a feel of how it is being with you again – against all the odds, against all what other people might say, I can only tell you that I know I am doing what makes me happy. Everything actually changed. It’s for the fact that I have loved you even more even after what happened to us.

10 months into reconnecting with you after the breakup, I’ve reconfirmed the fact that it’s still you after all.

This Day

Sleepless, I dragged my bags out of my house for the 4am flight that will take me to work for the next 38 days in a faraway place.

I know it’s an opportunity but it is also a challenge for me for several reasons I won’t elaborate further.

For now, all I know is that this will be the longest 38 days of my life. And I’ll be counting them seriously until the time I go back home for Christmas.

No Goodbyes

A day before I uproot myself to another place for the next 67 days, I had to leave my fur baby behind with him.

Leaving Jax behind for the day has never been easy every single time. But I always look forward to going home and having him beside me after a long day. He’s such a darling and my pick-me-upper no matter precocious he is.

Today, I will leave him with a very heart though with someone I can fully trust to take care of him like I’ve always done.

I know he will be okay. He will have a new fur friend and new people to mingle with.

As for him, there were no goodbyes. I couldn’t. I just had to turn my back to hide the tears that are for everyone and everything I’ll be temporarily leaving behind.